…of this author. Be prepared to be dazzled by the glamor and astonished at my competence:
7:00 a.m.–Boy 3 wakes up. Has awakened twice during the night, which is about par for the course. I’ve slept through the night about five times in the last 18 months, but I have hope it will end someday.
7:00-9:00 a.m.–get everyone ready for the day. Cereal, showers, clothes, finishing homework, finding mittens, etc.
9:05 a.m.–drop off Boy 1 and Cute Neighbor Kids at school.
9:10 a.m.–arrive at Target, feeling fantastically on top of things for getting everyone ready in time and for running errands so early. Items needed, in order of urgency: present for birthday party Boy 1 will be attending that afternoon, brown mailing paper to wrap copies of Being Sixteen up for mailing, soap, baby wipes, cereal, I-won’t-bore-you-any-further-you-get-the-gist-of-this. Neither Boy 2 nor Boy 3 break down while shopping. Sail out of the store flushed with triumph.
10:00 a.m.- Return home. Boy 3 down for nap. Pop in Blue’s Clues for Boy 2 and frantically write catalog copy for publisher.
10:30 a.m.- Time’s up. Blue’s Clues is over. Send e-mail to publisher with catalog copy and hang out with Boy 2, making lunch and talking.
11:00 a.m.-Boy 3 wakes up. Boys 2 and 3 eat a gourmet lunch of dinosaur chicken nuggets and pears. I eat too, and make cinnamon streusel muffins on the sly, because what is the point of not having a treat in winter during the afternoon? While making the muffins, however, and going through the grocery bags, I come to a disturbing revelation. I forgot to buy the birthday gift and the mailing paper. I did, however, manage to end up with another customer’s bag of bras. I am not even tempted to steal them, since I could never wear them (they are DD!) and if I am going to you-know-where for stealing, it is going to be for something better than bras.
12:25 p.m.– Muffins done, Boy 2 to preschool, return to Target. Give back bras. Buy the birthday gift but forget the mailing paper (I wish I were kidding).
1:30-2:30 p.m.–Back from Target, play with Boy 3 (who is so, so funny and cute but who was so, so naughty at Target the second time–hence the forgetting of the mailing paper) and put him down for bed.
2:30 p.m.-3:15 p.m.–Precious Writing Time. Stare at screen for several minutes trying to have coherent thought. Pull things together enough to rewrite a scene that I will later rewrite over again.
3:15-3:45 p.m.–Pick up kids from preschool and elementary school.
3:45-5:30 p.m.–After school snack (aforementioned muffins, Clementines, juice). Boy 1 off to birthday party. Play Legos with Boys 2 and 3. Prevent Boy 3 from ingesting Legos and break up many, many fights over Legos. But, also, have a pretty good time making a rocking spaceship for Indiana Jones Clonetrooper (we may have mixed a few sets here).
5:30-6:00p.m.–Husband home. (Yay!) Roads not clear enough to run outside, so run three miles on the treadmill and wish for spring.
6:00-8:00 p.m.–Dinner. Baths. Bedtime and story time for Boys 1,2,3.
8:00 p.m.-9:00 p.m.–Clean up dinner, bathtime mess, run laundry.
9:00 p.m.–Precious Writing Time. Also, headache time. Write for an hour, then give up and watch two episodes of 30 Rock with husband instead. Laugh until crying over “Werewolf Bar Mitzvah” sketch, and rewatch several times.
11:00 p.m.–Time to sleep.
The End.
(Just so you don’t think that I’m the laziest person in the world, I should add the caveat that I don’t usually give up so easily in the evenings with the writing–but this particular day was a Friday night, and I was tired. And I do usually spend most of Saturday writing)



